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Just what i'm feeling right now

i'm a little fed up

rain 20 °C

So this could be the first time i am writing in full what i am thinking right now and not giving a description of the week's events. I was writing this in an email to a friend and then it ended up being one of the most accurate accounts of my thoughts so i thought i'd put it here. It's quite a long whinge, not really important and maybe tomorrow i'll wish i didn't put it all down. But right now i feel like venting and recording one's current feelings and thoughts is one purpose of a blog so here you go.

And i just need to vent bigtime for a minute or few: [ now that i've written this i'm going to copy it onto my blog so feel free to not bother reading ahead!]
I'm more than a little, lets say 'frustrated'/'annoyed'/ or maybe bordering on 'pissed off' right now. i feel like i'm going to quite a lot of effort to cook things for dinner that everyone will eat but isn't the same old repetoire and i'm at the point where i feel like i just shouldn't bother. the last two nights for example - Thiursday i did 'crudites' which is something they have in the warm weather, basically just a variety of things (boiled egg, tuna, corn and asparagus from a can, chickpeas) all put separately so everyone can take what they like and dress with sauces or vinagrette. [ and i like because its healthy and not covered in anything]. Nadine and Frederic didn't have lunch so they were hungry so cooked pasta to have with. thats fine i just ate what i wanted. [Oh and Nadine decided at the last minute that Antonin would stay at his Grandparents and if i had known that before i would have made something interesting like a tomato, asparagus and goats cheese tart since Antonin doesn't like cheese and carries on like a 2year old if its put in front of him].
And even though Nadine constantly says to me that the kids have to eat/taste whatever's given to them, whenever i do make something they don't really like (and pasta, tomato sauce and ham is about all they consistently like) Nadine has to comment that "they would have eaten if...[insert amendment/big changes here]..." which to me seems pointless/stupid/and frustrating to tell me later what i should have made when she's told me before to make whatever i want.

So then tonight i make a quiche. everyone likes quiche but normally she just does a lorraine, ie ham and bacon bits (no cheese). So i think we have a lot of processed meat so i go to make a brocolli and and ham one. I need a bloody green vegetable every now and then. Her mum tells me this arvo Nadine doesn't like/can't eat brocolli or cauliflower, so when i get home i do half brocolli and ham, and half bacon and ham. It's late (as usual) when we sit down to dinner and Nadine whacks some puff-pastry wrapped sausage bits in the oven for aperitif which takes ages to cook. Then the kids want to go watch tele so she lets them (unusual but its Friday) and then its 8.30, they're not hungry anymore cos of the sausage and its late so she sends them to bed, and Frederic says he's not hungry, so my perfectly cooked quiche barely gets eaten. At least the rest is in the fridge and will go in the freezer asap.

Now Nadine also always says she would prefer to make those easy things like biscuits, flavoured crackers etc at home instead of buying to avoid the additives and preservatives (and it should be cheaper) but so far has never had the time. So i take the opportunity to bake a fair bit and all it hear is "it could do with more sugar" or "did you put salt in this?" or "it doesn't have much gout (flavour)."

Just on the side, to me this is a classic reaction of people who eat too much refined sugar and and salt products (as they do every single day) and whose taste buds require heavy flavourings for taste. Studies have been done to show this.

She supposedly doesn't like waste but on Wednesday she'd planned bbq sausages so that night i made a potato salad - nothing unsual just potatos, fresh chives and a mayo/mustard dressing. And a tabouli (which here they make with couscous not bulghur). Two things she would normally buy at the supermarket, god knows why because they are both simple salads with everyday ingredients and it's totally normal for me to make these things not buy. I can't do a coleslaw or any green salad other than rocket cos frederic won't eat cabbage or cucumber or raw tomatos and a lot of other veg. But potato and couscous are normally a sure thing for all. And i made plently since she has mentioned more than once that i should make 'more' of whatever i'm doing. But for some reason,probably because they started late again, not much got eaten.

So it's only friday and the potato and tabouli haven't been touched since. i suggested (so that the kids and frederic weren't presented with exactly the same thing) tomorrow we could mix the leftover tuna and corn from last night's crudites with the potato salad and then i would do roast carrots and i could throw the chickpeas through that. Two nice, normal dishes that would make good use of what was open in the fridge. But no she's implied that the potato salad will probably have to be thrown out becasue its got mayo in it and she's 'careful about things with egg.' It's been barely 48 hours and its tightly wrapped in plastic in the fridge!!!! So i kind of said i'm sure it really would be fine, she says "we can eat the leftover crudites but not to mix with potato in case it's not ok, we'll see tomorrow."
It's total bullshit. I'm trying to be helpful and she reckons they like to try new things, but overall almost everything i have made they have ways they'd 'improve' on it or it has some ingredient that at least one of them simply doesn't like. And i'm not just throwing things together i'm following rated recipes or making things i've been doing for years.

Honestly given how creative they can be at things like Antonin's and Amarine's celebration lunches you'd never think they really prefer to live on FRIED potato and FRIED carrots. Did i mention that unless its a stinking hot day the preferred method of cooking anything is in oil or butter in the frypan? /yes i think i did. The crudite routine is about the only thing they eat cold. I presented her with a magazine recipe for a shredded chicken, green bean and potato salad and she said "great, we'll throw it in the frying pan with some oil." So it tasted like fried olive oil. not what i was going for :(

And its even more annoying for me because with the recent warm weather the produce at the markets this week is great. There's quality cauliflower, peaches, apricots, brocolli, white and green asparagus, capsicum etc. All these colourful and many locally grown things! Today i went ahead and bought all these except the asparagus (a little expensive as far as nadine thinks, but it shits all over the bottled stuff she buys so really once evey few weeks should be fine) plus melon. I didn't buy zucchini only because ours is nearly ready. Otherwise there would be nothing fresh in the fridge except, yep carrots and potato in the cupboard.

So basically they are not anywhere near as open to tasting food as she straight out said they are. Maybe i'll have to start being a little less open too. I know when i've had too much stodgy stuff and not wanted to eat Maryvon the Grandma is quite concerned about my digestion and tells me to drink hot water and lemon juice which i do anyway so i think she is sometimes more aware of how heavy the food can be.

Honestly to save my sanity I think i'll have to leave my recipes til i return to Australia and just ask her what she wants me to make and then make sure i take more lunchtimes away from the house where i can eat more of what i choose. And the next time we have processed-floorsweeping-pork-mix-with-poultry fat-in-a-pastry-crust (this is actually a common aperitif called 'pate en croute') i will fake a severe stomach ache and appear to not eat for 2 days.

I promise the next blog will be a positive non-whinging one.

Posted by Madeline84 21:55 Archived in France

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